What Not To Wear

Sarah Jessica Parker, seen walking son James to school and wearing a Fashion Week shirt...if she cares that much about fashion, she should take those floods off her son!

Jean Charles de Castelbajac Lego Sunglasses

[Photo by Dominique Maitre. Source: WWD.com]

In case you missed his Spring RTW collection (or any of his other collections), kooky old French designer Jean Charles de Castelbajac has had a thing for childhood toys. If you liked the Lego dresses he put out this spring, you'll probably want to pick up a pair of the matching sunglasses, which you can build on with your own bucket-o-Legos if the spirit moves you.

You can buy JCDC stuff online from boutique Seven New York - much of it is 50% off.

It's 2010 Resort Season (If You're Loaded)

Most people think fashion has two seasons - Spring and Fall - in which all designers show their collections. But there's a third season - resort - which is sort of a year-round thing (though most of the collections are shown around May and June.) The clothing is basically intended for wear on private islands and yachts.

I can't even swing a beachfront room at a HoJo this summer, but it's still fun to see what I'd be shopping for if a fat trust fund had me headed for the Riviera.

From left: Marchesa dress, two looks by Lanvin.
[Images via WWD.com]

I love that the heavy metallic beading and sequin trends are going strong for resort as well as the fall and holiday seasons this year. I'm not sure if it's because I grew up on the 80's end of the glam rock era, but I live for sequins and beads and jewels and it's more than likely that the reflection off one of my outfits will one day cause a bus accident (like it almost did in high school.)

From left: Chanel, Balenciaga and Cynthia Rowley.
[Images via WWD.com]

Having come of age in the grunge era, I'm also pretty psyched that aspects of that aesthetic are emerging. I could give or take a flannel shirt, but I never got over layers, lace and disheveled looking textures. Chanel's knicker/bike shorts may gross out most people, but I'd rock those in a second.

Fall 2009 Makeup Trends

Click any image to enlarge in a new window

Color! So glad it's sticking around beyond the spring and summer seasons for 2009. Dior's models rocked the rainbow at the Fall 2009 show, and the old 80's up-to-the-eyebrows trend seems to be back with a vengeance. So long as you choose a flattering color for yourself, I say go nuts.

A slash of black liquid liner along the top lids is a classic look, but I like how they also lined the crease to create a longer eye at Moschino. At Vivienne Westwood they punked out the usually ladylike look by applying liner to the entire lid. Try Urban Decay's Liquid Liner in Perversion ($18 - P.S. I find the liners with brushes as opposed to "felt tips" create a cleaner line.)

Usually a summer makeup trend, bright coral showed up on lips and cheeks in two fall shows. Combined with a complementary bright pink lip or a doll-like smoky eye, when done lightly this color is completely wearable on most skin tones. Zac's model is wearing M.A.C. Cosmetics - Eyeshadow in Blackberry ($14.50)and Lipstick in Morange ($14.50). Betsey's model is wearing Stila - Long wear lip color in Hippie ($17)and Convertible Color in Gladiola ($25)on cheeks.

This is a strong look and a tough one to pull off, but with the right evening ensemble (I'd go with something simple, with a feminine accent like a ruffle or bow just for contrast) the goth lipped look can be done. Betsey's model is wearing Stila Cosmetics - Onyx Kajal eyeliner ($18) and Convertible Color in Poppy ($25), both on the lips.

I'm not a big bronzer gal myself, but toned down the full lid of shimmery brown shadow and a peachy nude blush can look really soft. Back in the day this went hand in hand with a heavily shaded brow - I like how they left them natural at the Chloe show (pictured.) Try Smashbox eyeshadow in Sienna ($16), layered with Urban Decay Midnight Cowboy shadow ($14).

And the best for last - conceptual God John Galliano sent the ghosts of gypsies past down the runway for fall, and thanks to some equally masterful makeup artistry, models looked like abandoned childhood dolls left to freeze in a blizzard.

Eyeshadow was applied to the entire socket of each eye, with the inner corners and browbones highlighted with a dash of metallic cream to prevent a completely punched-out look. Cheekbones were carved out with plum powder and brought forward with cool metallic highlighter.

I'm really fascinated by the way it was done, so be on the lookout for a how-to in the future.
A great highlighter I recently tested? Smashbox 2-in-1 Luminizing Primer. ($34 for .98 oz.)

Give Me a Black Eye

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[Clockwise from top left: Yigal Azrouel, Cavalli, Marc Jacobs, Marc Jacobs, Versace]

Dark and heavy - it's what many designers seem to have asked makeup gurus to deliver for Fall 2009, because it was all over the runways. This was not just a "smoky eye" - it was smoky, glossy, hard, reminiscent of both Egyptian royalty and proto-punk. Call it a cat eye if you will, but understand this is more the type that would maul you to death. You need attitude to rock this look, and not money.

Marc's girls wore Nars cosmetics (check out their "Night" series of shadows), applied by Francois Nars himself. Shocker since he hasn't worked a show in about a decade. People sure love Marc. Or he gives a mean BJ.
Azrouel's wore M.A.C. and Cavalli's went drugstore with Max Factor's 200 Calorie mascara piled on.

Just musing here: Maybe the vicious painted glare is their collective nod to the disasterous economy, the grittiness of life at the moment? With $50,000 dresses flying down the runway beneath these faces, it would appear (at least I would hope) to be an ironic juxtaposition.

McQueen's Runway Terrors

[Photos by Giovanni Giannoni via WWD.com]

If you haven't already seen highlights from his show posted on the rest of the internet, take a moment to check out his Dave McKean drawing meets Amanda Lepore meets Pierrot clown meets Edward Scissorhands meets the bird exhibit at the zoo Fall 2009 collection from this past Tuesday at Paris Fashion Week.

McQueen, as you may have noticed, is always my most anticipated part of every fashion week. If he and John Galliano (my other hero) ever teamed up for a show I think my face might fall off. I. Love. Drama. And no one does it better.

While everything was truly conceptual and barely wearable outside a costume ball or a Broadway stafe, I do hope that mass-market textile designers take note of the incredible print featured on several of the dresses in which houndstooth deteriorates into a vicious swarm of birds. Also fantastic is his use of volume in the shorter jackets' sleeves and their huge scuptural lapels. But my favorite is a classic example of the "nightmare/fairytale" aesthetic he is so known for - a super goth harness bodiced dress with a leathery mass of skirt attached. Oh, to be Victoria Beckham.

Pugh Working on Shoes and Makeup, Still No Word on Dior Gig

Above: British designer Gareth Pugh Inset: "Jack Fairy"

Goth couture sensation Gareth Pugh is said to be hard at work on two new ventures - a shoe line and his own brand of cosmetics. Meanwhile the designer teeters on the verge of taking over Dior Homme.

[Images by Ellis Scott via WWD.com]

His Fall 2009 RTW collection in Paris yesterday had some critics' panties in a bunch because he chose to do it as a short film instead of a traditional live production. Looks were very Barbarella by way of Edward Gorey. I'm loving the asymmetry in the jackets, the a-line cape silhouettes and the narrow trousers. Nothing that hasn't been shown 50 times already on runways of late, but I'm not going to lie - I kind of love this kid. If for no other reason, he bears a striking resemblance Jack Fairy from the Todd Haynes movie "Velvet Goldmine."

Christian Siriano Gets Fierce With Payless; Spears Loves Candies

Project Runway peacock Christian Siriano is only just showed his first for-real RTW line at New York Fashion week this spring, and already he's expanding into the "fast fashion" game. This September Payless will feature the designer's first stab at shoe design with a 5-pair collection (2 ankle booties, 3 hidden-platform pumps) and two coordinating handbags.

Get a sneak peek at the shoes his designs will be inspired by here.

Boyfriend is following in the footsteps of Lela Rose, Abaete and Patricia Field, who have all dabbled in the cheapo shoe game with Payless collections.

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Keeping with their "slutty blond chick" advertising tradition, Candie's (now sold at Kohl's) has paid Britney Spears a bazillion dollars to be the face of their hideous clunky shoes. Former spokes-skanks include Jenny McCarthy and Hayden Panettiere.

Seriously? Britney can't be that broke. Even she's above a Candie's campaign.

It's London Fashion Week

And lately it's becoming my favorite of the fashion weeks. Here are a few trends I'd like to see cross the pond:

(Click either image for a closer peek)

These are three of the best looks to hit the London runways to date:

Giles, Julien MacDonald, and Richard Nicoll.
I'm in love with the fabrics, the tailoring and the general future-romantic vibe, respectively.

For more on the London Shows, hit up WomensWearDaily.com.

Another Parsons Star on the Rise

[Photos by George Chinsee via Womens Wear Daily]

Just wanted to take a moment to point out the gorgeousness of the work my old Parsons friend Prabal Gurung let loose on the world during New York fashion week a few days ago. He designed for Cynthia Rowley and Bill Blass (and was a fashion success in his native Nepal before arriving in the US) before finally launching his own namesake label aimed at the richest of the rich. You might also have seen him on an episode of America's Next Top Model making a disgusted face at one of the contestants as she runway hobbled across Cynthia's studio on a go-see (a moment that brought me much joy.)

My bet is he'll have no trouble winning the loyalty and adoration of the elite. My broke ass is already a MAJOR fan. Look at the back of the black and white number! The red and black Blade Runner dress! And the beaded one! Prabal, when I make my first million, you're my first call.

King McQueen and a Rather Dull YSL

[Photos by Khepri Studio via WWD.com]

Pre-fall from Alexander McQueen featured long silhouettes with volume placed at the extremities in the form of fishtail skirts, layered jackets and bell sleeves.

I'd love for the stained-glass print (center) to overtake the tired tattoo as the lazy labelwhore's look du jour. (Haven't we had our fill of Ed Hardy yet? I mean, when the skanks on Rock of Love are fans, you need to take a step back and reconsider your choices.)

[Photos by Dominique Maitre via WWD.com]

Meanwhile, Yves Saint Laurent gave us this elegant (but been-there-done-that) Grecian gown and a sick asymmetric leather bomber. Beyond that, there wasn't much that was flattering or innovative. The highwater pleated pants, plain shift dresses and torso-widening woven details did nothing for me.

Vivienne Westwood Forgot Her Meds

Granted most guys on earth dress like shit anyway, but I look to the runways to steer them towards improvement, not further peril. Let me share with you some choice looks from the completely disjointed and bizarre men's Pre-Fall 2009 collection by older-than-fuck fashion rockstar Vivienne Westwood. God love her for pioneering decades of fearless visual bitchslap style, and having that vision years before she got her first rubber sweater over Johnny Rotten's greasy head. But I'm not going to lie - after this shambling shitshow (with like a handful of straight up suits mixed in?), she might wanna stick to womenswear.
Then again what do I know, maybe I just don't understand her genius and she's trying to appeal to these untapped niche markets:

Ex 90's Club Kids
Dave Matthew's Band roadies
John Cougar Mellencamp
Black dudes who really want to get beat up
Psychedelic... chicken... warriors?

[All photos by Davide Maestri via WWD]

What's New: Fur Vests, Hammer Pants and a Puzzle Piece

Just wanted to show you what's in store (and in style) for next fall in case you're the ahead-of-the-game type. While most of the other established design houses gave us nothing but barf-worthy prints (exception below) and "Is that grandma's fucking curtains?" brocade numbers in their recent pre-Fall 2009 shows, the always fantastic Nicolas Ghesquiere kicked out a 70's rocker staple -the shagged-out fur vest- for Balenciaga to remind us all what glam really means. Although I'd advise you to rock faux fur unless you're either an Eskimo or a fucking asshole.

I'm also loving and dying for those pants - harem styles (i.e. Hammer Time) will be on the racks this summer for those who dare (you need 2 things - be thin and wear high-ass heels), but I'm favoring this punk jodphur skinny-harem-combo. I'll post a copycat version that isn't $9,000 when I find one, in both cases.

As for aforementioned exception to the gnarly prints out there, Alexander Wang gave us this crossword getup, which again, I'm dying for:

LA Fashion Week

I feel like LA Fashion week is as fake as the tits that inhabit the city. LA Fashion week seems to happen just for the sake of having a fashion week in LA. Sure, La La Land is filled with designers, celebrities, PR firms, and bloggers with nothing better to do with their time than complain about fashion. You would think that the organizers would put a little more effort into making this an event not to be missed. This year, it seemed very phoned-in. Perhaps it’s because this may be the last Los Angeles Fashion Week…?

I suppose some of LA’s hotspot locations were probably in use for the third premier party of Beverley Hills Chihuahua. Fashion Week took place in Culver City. Now, I like Culver City. I think it has some interesting things to do and see, but, right now, with construction off the 405, it is not the most attractive part of LA. (Technically, it’s not even in LA.) Furthermore, Fashion Week took place at Smashbox Studios located in an industrial park. After a show (if you’re one of the many people who’s name got misplaced on the list to go backstage), you’re left dawdling around for forty-five minutes in a warehouse with nothing to do but sip vodka Red Bulls to pass the time. I would’ve loved to hit up a Starbucks or walk around a busy sidewalk because, frankly, I did look fantastic. (Here’s a link to the BeBe dress I wore.)

Additionally, when Lauren Conrad’s bitter classmates volunteer their time to check in guests, it does not make for a happy crowd. With vacant expressions and ill-desire to check the guest list passed the letter “A”, of course, they informed me my name wasn’t on the list. After I used the word “miscommunication”, their befuddled look made it seem I was somewhat intelligent and important and they gave me a standing-ticket to the Samora show.

Her Paris-inspired Spring ’09 designs were such a refreshing site after the stress of actually arriving. Filled with ruffles, pleats, and chiffon, it made me realize that hot pink and lime green can look good together and not be only reminiscent of cheap Easter baskets people buy at CVS. What whetted my appetite were her black and white designs that had that French flair, but, also, vaguely resembled the fashion on Mad Men. Here’s a pic of my fave:

The Sound of Fashion

Below is a list of whose models strutted to what at New York Fashion Week
(via Women's Wear Daily)

• “Just a Friend” by Biz Markie (Trovata)
• “L.E.S. Artistes” by Santogold (Erin Wasson + RVCA)
• “Breaking It Up” by Lykke Li (Lela Rose)
• “Shut Up and Let Me Go” by The Ting Tings (Rag & Bone, Preen, Missy Sixty)
• “Gobbledigook” by Sigur Rós (Zero + Maria Cornejo)
• “Let the Music Play” by Shannon (Proenza Schouler)
• “Rhapsody in Blue” composed by George Gershwin, performed by the Chicago Symphony Orchestra (Marc Jacobs)
• “Wild Thing” by Tone-Loc (Betsey Johnson)
• “Repetition Kills You” by The Black Ghosts (MaxAzria)
• “Gone Daddy Gone” by Gnarls Barkley mixed into the original by The Violent Femmes (MaxAzria)
• “Good Vibrations” by The Beach Boys (Michael Kors)
• “Everybody Wants to Rule the World” by Tears for Fears (Richard Chai)
• “Electric Feel” by MGMT (3.1 Phillip Lim)
• “I Want Candy” by White Williams (Vera Wang)
• “That’s Not My Name” by The Ting Tings (G-Star)
• “Jungle Drum” by Emilíana Torrini (Zac Posen)
• “You Run Run Run Me Ragged” by Mick Jagger (L’Wren Scott; see Eye Scoop)

- Playing MGMT wins Lim the hipster award; trying to be fresh by using The Ting Tings was totally obvious and unimpressive because of that stupid iTunes commercial.
- Now, I want you to try something at home. Put on "Good Vibrations" and just TRY to do a Miss J. sashay down the hallway. Impossible! Those poor Kors models, without a beat to guide them.
- Betsey Johnson's pick was as always, adorable and cute. So suited for her looks.
- L'Wren Scott got the dude she was banging to write her two songs specifically for her collection. Fortunately that dude is Mick Jagger, and word is he won't even be recording those songs. She wins the rarity award (but I hope someone snuck in a tape recorder and bootlegs that shit - people at the show LOVED the jams.)

It's Official

Nicky Hilton really has talent. Last year I saw glimmers of it, and now it's full-fledged. The educated Hilton sister put out a cohesive and wearable equestrian-inspired collection for her label Nicholai at L.A. Fashion Week this past Wednesday.
Check it out (it's here, past all the annoying photos of an over-tanned Paris.)

Now That's Balls

That's not Vogue editor Anna Wintour. But she sure fooled a lot of people at the Lanvin fashion show in Paris. (The real Anna was already on her way home to NYC by then.)
Do you think the people who fell for it got fired? And how about the actress-- will she be quietly executed and tossed in the Seine?
If A.W. never knew before that her drag-ability level was high, she does now. Maybe it's time for a new haircut, bitch.

Small Bites

Dior Fall '08
(Photos: Danielle Oberauch)

I don't know what else to say about the latest 60's Mega-Barbie collection from Dior but that I'm mad, completely mad about it. Not only the clothes, but the hair and makeup as well.
Now I can't decide if Catherine from Rock of Love 2 was really ahead of the game, or has just hung on to the look since the real 1965.
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Word is we'll be seeing a knocked-up Nicole Kidman on a fall Vogue cover, shot by Annie Leibovitz (of course.)
Hey-- is it ok to Botox with a bun in the oven? If not, no wonder they shot the image so soon... before she reverts to a real-age state.
Let's pray it's not another naked Demi/Britney/Christina shot.
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There's an indoor smoking ban in PARIS now? The world must be coming to an end. Then again, Jarvis Cocker's comment to WWD that "it's a good excuse to leave a room" is an apt one. Why deny the French that privilege?
P.S. What do you think he's doing with Wes Anderson? A soundtrack or maybe acting?

Mad for Plaid

Y-3, D&G, Jaeger and House of Holland
(Photos: Marcio Madeira, Style.com)

Want to get a jump on your fall wardrobe? Put tartan on your list. The Scottish patterns were all over the runways this season in New York, London and Milan. Designers showed it in classic pleated skirts, dresses, jackets and even antlers in colors that ran the gamut from classic reds, blues and greens to electric purple.
Among the purveyors of plaid: D&G, House of Holland, Jaeger London, Y-3, punk diva Vivienne Westwood (of course). Shockingly, Burberry showed none.
Here are a few cute plaid pieces to get you started:

Coat: Victoria's Secret, $138; Pink purse: Target, $24.99; Belt: American Eagle, $9.99; Boot: Urban Outfitters, $34.99; Tote: Lulu's Fashion Lounge, $32; Dress: Urban Outfitters, $24.99; Blouse: Delia's, $14.99; Jacket: Forever 21, $29.80.

Whole Lotta Lace at Prada

Prada fall '08
(Photos: Marcio Madiera, Style.com)

Miuccia Prada went lace crazy on her Fall '08 collection in Milan yesterday, with an emphasis on black and fuller-coverage cuts. She also showed some vomit-inducing beige, white and powder blue iterations, which appeared more heavily textured.
I see the more delicate black lace sheaths coming through as a fall trend. It's classic, ladylike and wearable. She also showed some camel monochromatic looks in sleeker fabrics that were very 1970's , which could viably translate as a real-world trend.